Dear Baby Trey,
You’re about 11 days old now and I haven’t gotten to hold you in 10 days. Between sickness and traveling and the holidays I’ve just been watching you come alive through pictures your mama texts me. All that to say, I wrote you a letter.
I wasn’t sure if I had enough time to get to the hospital before your mama brought you into this world. I drove like a slightly crazy person, left the coffee pot on, and put on a change of clothes I had worn the day before. But thankfully (for me) you took your sweet time that last hour.
Throughout the times I walked in and out of the hospital I started noticing others. Frail people in wheelchairs with oxygen climbing into warm cars to go home for the holidays, hunched over pale people shuffling to the door, glowing mothers-to-be doing laps around the maternity floor trying to get things going. I was rushing in because of new life, your life. But I knew that others were rushing in for far worse reasons. My heart uttered quiet prayers as I watched people going to and fro. Mine the very best of reasons, others, maybe not as much.
Trey, you came into this world amidst a flurry of activity and small flurry of snow. The air was brisk and biting but the sun was shining like it was the middle of summer. There were holiday songs and Christmas trees. A large manger in the entrance of the hospital lobby. Sights and sounds and smells and things I will never forget. Because it was the day that you took your first breath.
Your grandparents and I were waiting in the family room across the hall from your delivery room. Nurses were bustling in and out, never making eye contact. This frustrated your grandma to no end! Its entirely possible your grandpa and I made a joke about how the hospital staff clearly had it out for us. Thus eliciting a small smile from your grandma.
But Trey something drew me to the door to listen the very moments you took your first breath and let out your first cry. I heard that hollering and shivers ran down my spine. It wasn’t until later when your daddy told us what time you were born that I knew those were your first cries.
Now as far as what happened in the labor and delivery, your mama is going to have to share that story.
Trey, here’s what I want you to know.
You entered a world that is broken and fallen and hurting. You entered a world that won’t make sense and will probably break your heart in some way. You entered a world that has things we’ll try so desperately to protect you from but will probably fail at more times than not.
But Trey, you entered a family full of goodness and hope and love. You entered a family who will always try to believe the best about and for each other. You entered a family who would lay down their very lives for you.
The people you will call mama and daddy are two of the best people I have ever known. They are full of wisdom, joy, love, and grace. They have loved you and prayed for you before they even knew your name. The laughter they bring to each other and to this world is something that can never be replaced. In fact, your daddy had us giggling when at 6 hours old he was offering Sour Patch Kids to your mama and me and he looked at you, asleep in your tiny bassinet and goes, “Trey, son, you good? you want one? No? Okay.”
Your parents have a deep abiding love for each other, for you, and for Jesus. Remember that. Their love for you will never fail. Their hope for you will never fail. Their joy in you will never fail.
Trey, my prayer for you is that you grow to leave a mark on this world. That you will leave it better than you entered it. My prayer is that you bury yourself into the heart of Jesus from a young age and never lose sight of that. My prayer is that you grow to be strong and courageous always choosing to stand up for the right thing no matter what it costs you.
I hope you know that your family doesn’t just consist of your mama and daddy and numerous (!) aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents. Your family consists of dozens of people who may not share your DNA or your blood line but we adore you. We love you. We will fight for you and protect you and watch you grow. We will cheer you on in basketball and band concerts and graduations. We are your team and you will always have us in your corner no matter what. Ask us questions. Listen to our stories. Let us love you as deeply as we can. Because our love for you is like an ocean.
Sweet baby Trey… the life you have before you is full of adventure, heartbreak, love, scraped knees and maybe broken arms, missing front teeth and grass stains. Find the things you love, that bring you life, and chase after those. Because the world needs more people who live fully alive.
You are LOVED baby Trey.
With all my heart,